


i have your hand, you have my heart

by lovelyspiral



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 14:48:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13079181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelyspiral/pseuds/lovelyspiral
Summary: Yuri’s hair, damp and dark blonde, is plastered to his forehead and the bridge of his nose; it’s so undeniably cute that JJ blurts, “Date me?”





	i have your hand, you have my heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Bakaramia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bakaramia/gifts).



Yuri’s hair, damp and dark blonde, is plastered to his forehead and the bridge of his nose; it’s so undeniably  _ cute _ that JJ blurts, “Date me?” 

He’s thought about this moment plenty of times. It’s not supposed to be like this, but, well, here they are: Yuri, mouth open with water dripping off his chin, and JJ, smile slightly frozen. Waiting, hoping. 

“What?” Yuri says. 

JJ’s stomach is forming nervous knots already. He could just take it back, pretend he never said anything, but that’s not really his style. He steels himself, squares his shoulders. “Would you like to go on a date with me, Yuri?” 

He can do this. He can handle it.

Yuri pushes his hair out of his face. “Are you really asking me out in a  _ locker room?” _

The knots burst into butterflies, because the incredulous look on Yuri’s face is  _ even more cute  _ than JJ could have ever anticipated. And -- it’s not a  _ no,  _ Yuri hasn’t kicked him or hit him or anything. Yuri hasn’t done that in a while, but still. It’s a worry of his. 

A light bulb goes off as Yuri blinks at him. 

“I see,” JJ mutters. “You’re a  _ romantic,  _ why didn’t I think of that--” 

“What?” Yuri says again. “No.” 

“No?” JJ  hopes he doesn’t look too crestfallen. “Why not?”

Maybe that was too forward. Maybe it should be obvious  _ why not _ . Lately, though, Yuri has felt like a friend, sometimes more with the hand brushes and shoulder touches, the lingering looks and louder laughs. They’ve even started to stay in touch. Last night, they had gone out to dinner. Otabek fell asleep on the table, but they had stayed there for about another hour and kept drinking and talking. Yuri had hugged him goodnight, tipsy and beaming, and his lips had brushed JJ’s cheek. That warmth still hasn’t left JJ, pushed the words  _ date me  _ to his lips. 

JJ can’t help but think that there had been something there. Something that’s been growing slowly but surely.

“No, I’m not a romantic,” Yuri says hotly. JJ comes back to the moment. “And you just cost me good money, because I told Beka I was gonna ask you out, and he said I wouldn’t, so no, I’m not a romantic, but yeah, I’ll go on a fuckin’ date with you.”

Yuri’s cheeks are flushed, pearly-looking from the thin sheen of water still clinging to his skin. JJ sneaks a glance at himself in the mirror: his own hair is slicked back perfectly, and there are matching spots of color on his face. 

“Really?” His voice is a little too high-pitched. Shit. “Were you going to ask me last night?” 

Yuri folds his his arms. Is that a pout? That’s a pout. Looking steadfastly at the top of JJ’s head, chin at a haughty angle, Yuri says, “Yeah.” 

“Was Otabek just pretending to be asleep?” 

“ _ No _ ,” Yuri says, but to JJ, it sounds a little like a  _ yes. _ That could just be wishful thinking, though. 

Importantly -- Yuri wanted to ask him out. He needs to focus.

“You like me?” JJ says softly. He wants go closer, hold Yuri, but when he steps forward, Yuri steps back, so he waits. Yuri rocks back and forth on his feet before offering JJ a smile. It’s minuscule but it’s everything JJ could have asked for. 

“You’re not as bad as you used to be.”

“You like me,” JJ grins. “Yuri-chan has a crush on me?” 

He pauses. “You’re not fucking with me, right?” 

“ _ Crush  _ is a stupid word,” Yuri says. “But I mean it. I want the best damn date of my life.” 

In the curve of Yuri’s thin lips, JJ spies the softness he has come to know and grow fond of. A bead of water rolls off Yuri’s chin, and Yuri wipes at his face with the edge of his sleeve. “Let’s go, yeah?”

They begin to walk back to the stadium, Yuri with his hands shoved in his pockets and JJ vibrating with excitement. 

“How were you going to ask me?” JJ says. “You were going to try and be real cool, eh?”

“I was going to say if I won, which I will, that you should treat me.” Yuri replies, surprisingly compliant. “What made  _ you _ ask me, huh?” 

“You looked really cute.” 

“I’m not cute!” Yuri sputters. The spots of pink blessing his skin say otherwise. 

“You are.” JJ pinches Yuri’s cheek. “And you hugged me yesterday, and before that, you’ve been nothing but a perfect muse.” 

“So the person in your songs?” Yuri raises an eyebrow. “That’s me?”

“You listen to my songs? This day gets better and better.” 

“Yeah, as alarms,” Yuri replies. “They’re so annoying I  _ have  _ to get out of bed to turn them off.” 

“Honored,” JJ laughs, and Yuri punches his arm. “Good luck out there,  _ chaton.”  _

“I don’t need it.”

“Don’t be like that,” JJ says. “Let me be a good sport, eh?” 

Yuri huffs, knocks his shoulder against JJ’s. “Come to my room tonight. After I win. I’ll see you.”

“See you on the podium. You know, after  _ I  _ win,” JJ calls after him. Yuri tosses back a smirk. Thin-lipped smiles like that always cause one of Yuri’s canines to poke out, and it’s so, so  undeniably fitting for the little tiger. 

He keeps watching until Yuri turns, raises a vague salute. It’s the closest to  _ good luck _ that he’s going to get. 

Something about Yuri makes JJ feel like a kid. It’s fun teasing him. Still, it had only been when he had pulled back years ago that Yuri had ventured closer, and gradually, they had been able to trade actual words instead of insults, and now, they’ve branched a delicate new equilibrium between friendship and rivalry. If he thinks about it, their turning point seems to be the night by the hotel pool, after Yuri’s second gold. When he had told Leo the story about Yuri pushing him under the water, Leo had been unimpressed, mildly concerned. “Doesn’t that seem dangerous to you?” 

“Nah,” JJ had waved a hand. “It was like… a play-fighting kitten.” 

Leo whistled. “If Plisetsky heard that, he’d kick you so hard.” 

“It’s fine,” JJ said. “I took him down with me. It was fun.” 

It  _ had  _ been fun. Sometimes they would even meet at the pool like that first time, and JJ would glance at how Yuri’s reflection warped and reformed as he told his stories, gesticulating wildly. 

Writing songs about those nights came easily. 

_ (i wish i could hold you closer and closer _

_ i wish i could talk to you louder and louder _

_ but you’re oceans away  _

_ yeah you’re oceans away _

_ even if you were here _

_ i wouldn’t know what to say _

_ cause baby you got me tongue-tied _

_ with the way you toss your hair _

_ the way you lean into my side _

_ and for a moment everything’s alright _

_ and i can’t wait to see you again) _

His mother’s hand on his shoulder breaks him out of his thoughts. “You ready?”

“Ready.” 

Nathalie’s smile is warm. “You’ll seize the stage.” 

“I will, maman,” JJ promises, but at the back of his head, there’s a whisper:  _ watch me, Yuri.  _

For his free skate, he’s designed his costume to be a little more elaborate. He wears a black mesh long-sleeved shirt, with slits to show off his tattoos, under a tight black leather vest with large, circular gold clasps bearing the letters JJ. 

Honestly? He wonders if it’s something that Yuri will like. He glances over at the stands, lets his gaze skirt over the Russian team until he sees pale, pale hair and ocean water eyes.

Yuri sticks his tongue out at him. JJ blows a kiss. For a moment, he wishes Isabella to here to cheer him on, blow a kiss back, but she’s quite busy planning her sister’s wedding. He’ll have to call her later. 

He has about five minutes before he has to skate. It’s been a while since he’s tried to meditate, but the least he can do is breathe. He picks a Canadian flag fluttering the audience and focuses on it, steadying his breathing. He’s doing this for his country, for his parents, for his fans. 

_ For myself. To show the world who I am and what I can do.  _

His name is called. He steps onto the ice, feels the cold anew. He shivers, and it’s with anticipation. He makes a lazy loop, blowing kisses to his fans and throwing up Js. The girls shriek and he can see them excitedly waving flowers. 

The music begins. He skates: muscle memory take over, familiar notes washing away everything else. 

_ Glide left right jump and land and spin and glide left --  _

His muscles begin to ache and he pushes into the feeling with a grin. He feels like he’s soaring; he  _ knows  _ he is, knows he has the highest jumps here. 

He can taste the cool metal of gold. 

As much as a part of him wants to worry about how he looks, being in the spotlight is his high. Today is a good day, and he’s unstoppable. The crowd is a dull roar against the music. JJ wants to shout with them, let the euphoria in his chest burst through, but this is a different kind of stage. He lets his smile do the singing and finishes his program with a triumphant leap.

Roses rain down on him. The screams are deafening. 

Chest heaving, he wishes he could skate  _ longer.  _ That felt good; his parents are beaming, so he probably did do well. JJ’s body shakes with unexpected relief and he skates into Nathalie and Alain’s waiting embrace. 

The tiredness hits when he closes his eyes, and his parents lead him to the kiss and cry where he can lean against Nathalie comfortably. His scores flash. He’s first -- unless -- 

_ Yuri hasn’t skated yet.  _

The race for gold is just beginning. Still, there’s nothing like the bite of competition. JJ watches the other skaters with interest but his right leg bounces with impatience. He wants to see Russia’s darling. 

Yuri skates last, and as expected, his free skate is beautiful. His costume is a dark green, shimmering with gold stitches that form scales. Waist up, it’s skin colored. Yuri is skating to a retelling of  _ The Little Mermaid,  _ and there are little scales painted on his face as well, as if someone had peeled back his skin, revealing his true guise. He looks otherworldly. When Yuri skates, he gives his expressions to the story and nothing more. The punk is nowhere to be seen; today the fairy rules the rink. 

Yuri moves like he really is underwater, slow yet fluid. When he leaps through the air, spins like he’s been buffeted by waves, JJ finds his breath catch. Yuri has only been getting better and better since he debuted. He ends the skate with raised, imploring arms, accepting Heaven over love, and maybe, just maybe, his eyes cut to JJ. 

He’s out of breath from his own skate, but JJ cups his hands over his mouth and cheers. Yuri’s mouth twitches. 

_ So he was looking at me?  _

Yakov and Lilia hustle Yuri away after the performance, but JJ keeps watching, and when Yuri looks back, JJ winks, and sees Yuri’s shoulders shake with laughter. 

_ He was looking at me.  _

Yuri takes first. 

 

On the podium, cameras blind JJ as Yuri talks to him between flashes. 

“That's another win for me,” Yuri says smugly. 

“So you’re keeping count?” 

“Shut up.” Yuri rolls his eyes. “It’s easy when I have a hundred percent success rate.”

“It is not,” JJ mimics him, over-exaggerating his own eye roll. Yuri snorts.

“Technically,” JJ says. “I win.”

Yuri raises an eyebrow. “I don’t see gold between your teeth, Leroy.”

“But a certain someone said when they’d win gold…” JJ waggles his eyebrows back. “I get a date, don’t I?”

Yuri flushes, a beautiful red under his green face paint. “I’m beginning to wonder why.” 

“I’ll see you tonight,” JJ says, and raises silver to his lips. “Congratulations, Yuri. You deserve it.” 

As much as he wants to plan how things will go with Yuri, JJ passes out as soon as he gets back to his hotel room. Nathalie wakes him an hour before the afterparty, and he sleepily shoves his limbs into his suit as quickly as he can.

Somehow the party’s in full swing once he gets there. Across the room, JJ sees Yuri, in a suit of brittle bottle-glass green. It matches his eyes; JJ thinks of sunsets at the beach. 

“Is that the same suit from last year?” Yuri wrinkles his nose. 

“Blue is tried and true,” JJ says. “You look good.” 

At that, Yuri smiles faintly and clinks his flute of champagne against JJ’s. “Not bad yourself.” 

They drink. 

“Wait, should we have made a toast?” JJ frowns.

“To what?”

JJ shrugs. “To us.”

Yuri considers. “Hm. To us winning?”

“Yeah.” 

It’s at that point that Mila appears to haul Yuri to the dance floor. JJ watches from the sidelines as Yuri and Mila sweep across the floor, an elegant storm even as they bicker. 

Just looking at Yuri is giving him butterflies. Or maybe it’s the champagne.  
  
  


At around two o’clock, Yuri reappears and pinches JJ’s sleeve. “Let’s get out of here.” 

The door to Yuri’s room looks exactly like every other door in the hallway, but it makes JJ break out in sweat. Somewhere along the line, Yuri’s taken him by the hand. The high of the competition, of Yuri, has simmered, and anxiety bubbles its familiar song. He doesn’t have his program to distract him and they’re  _ alone,  _ and honestly, he hadn’t thought that he would get this far. His palms grow clammy, slip in Yuri’s grip. 

“Hey,” Yuri says, breath close and tinted with vodka, “it’s fine. Don’t worry.” 

“I’m fine,” JJ says. “I’m fine.” 

JJ flops on the bed while Yuri changes into a hoodie and sweatpants. Yuri slides under the covers next to him, rests his head on JJ’s shoulder. “You good?”

“Yeah,” JJ says. “I’m just -- nervous.”

“About what?” Yuri’s looking up at JJ through his eyelashes, a small smirk on his face. “Do I scare you?”

There are freckles dotting Yuri’s skin, tinged green by his makeup. JJ counts them, breathes. Says, “I don’t want to mess this up.” 

Yuri scoffs. “I’m probably the one who’s going to mess this up, shut up. You’re fine.” 

“You’ve been really nice.” JJ says. “I like it.” 

“Yeah, well,” Yuri says, “I like you.” 

“I like you too.” JJ tries not to choke on his laugh. “That’s why I’m so nervous.”

“You make it look easy, though,” Yuri says. “What’s up? You were fine before.”

“It just sunk in, I guess. I was always happy to just be your friend and while I thought there were, eh, signals? I didn’t -- well,” JJ clears his throat, “let’s talk about something else. What do you want to do? For our date, I mean.” 

Yuri’s mouth is quirked up; he rolls onto JJ’s chest and kisses his forehead. It’s gentle, and surprisingly sweet. But Yuri’s like that: unexpected in the best ways. 

“There’s an art exhibition that Beka told me about,” Yuri says. “Do you like stuff like that?” 

“Yeah,” JJ says. “Do you?” 

“It’s cool,” Yuri says. “Though we probably won’t get it and just squint at it and nod, right?” 

“Sounds fun,” JJ says. “As long as I’m spending time with you, I’m happy.” 

“Happy and scared,” Yuri says.

“Yeah,” JJ says. “Happy and scared.” 

“Sleep here,” Yuri says. His hand curls over JJ’s chest, tugging at his tie. “And we’ll go in the morning? We can get up at nine.” 

JJ raises an eyebrow. “I have nothing to wear.” 

“You say that like it’s a problem.” Yuri raises his eyebrows right back. 

“Yuri-chan,” JJ says. “I can’t show all my cards before our first date!” 

Yuri is unimpressed. “I’ve seen your modeling shoots.”

“Those our photos. This is  _ privilege.”  _

“Wow.” 

“So any extra clothes? Or I can go back to my room and come back?”

“There’s like those complimentary robes,” Yuri scrunches up his nose. “You’ll look like a total grandpa.” 

“A foxy grandpa.”

“ _ Ew.”  _

The robe is, in fact, totally sexless, and Yuri gets in a few more old man jibes before he falls asleep on JJ’s shoulder. 

“Just like a kitten,” JJ murmurs to himself, and then his head droops onto Yuri’s. 

 

JJ wakes up to Yuri’s elbow in his side. Yuri’s  _ sprawled  _ all over the bed, his legs tangled with JJ’s and his mouth open as he dozes. Sunlight filters in through the blinds, turning Yuri’s blonde hair into strands of gold. 

“Yuri,” JJ yawns, “morning.”

No response. 

JJ takes a couple minutes to scroll through his social media, waiting for Yuri’s alarm to go off. It doesn’t come after about fifteen minutes, and JJ checks the time on his phone. 

It’s past  _ noon.  _

After a brief, brief panicked moment, there’s only one thing left to do.

He cups his hands around Yuri’s ear and yells, “Yuri-chan!” 

Yuri’s hand flies up and pushes his face away.  _ “ _ Whaaat?”

“When’s your flight again?” 

“Two?” Yuri pulls a pillow over his face. “Why are you so fucking loud in the morning?” 

“Chaton,” JJ says. “It’s twelve-thirty. It’s not morning.” 

A pause, and then a muffled, cautious, “JJ.”

“It is!” JJ slides his phone under the pillow to Yuri. “Look.” 

“Oh,  _ fuck.”  _ Yuri rockets out, begins throwing clothes into his suitcase. His hair is wavy and rumpled, falling out of the braid he had slept in, but to JJ it’s still charming, even as more strands begin to stick up everywhere. 

“I can help,” JJ offers, but Yuri’s already run off into the bathroom. 

Trudging over, he sees Yuri brushing his teeth with the same ferocity that he practices with. 

“Hey,” JJ says, “want me to drive you to the airport?” 

Yuri nods, eyes wide. 

“You’ll be ready to go at one?” 

Another nod. 

“I’ll be right back then,” JJ waves and Yuri gives a quick, distracted wave in return. 

On the way back to his room, decked out in his crumpled suit, JJ lets himself feel briefly disappointed. One moment to mourn what could’ve been this first date. One moment to refocus that something totally unprecedented had happened: he and Yuri were set to go on a date at  _ some  _ point. Yuri likes him. 

And waking up to him this morning? Yeah, it had been a little hectic, but not totally unsurprising. He’s pretty sure almost every skater ever has slept in until a flight before. He probably should’ve seen this coming. 

He can’t help but sigh.

It’s been years since JJ has felt in love. There’s still _love_ in his life: his family, God, singing, skating, his charity. Even though splitting with Izzy had been amicable, they don’t talk _as_ much (once again, expected) and he kinda misses the feeling. Not Izzy herself; she’s a friend now, and he wouldn’t dare disrespect her by trying to beg for her back, but sometimes he just misses having someone.

He never had thought Yuri could become a potential ‘someone.’ Someone he could steal little moments of domesticity with between the life of a skater. Growing up with figure skating parents -- and following in their footsteps -- has taught JJ to cherish those moments. 

Waking up together and tackling errands could be romantic enough if you tried, right? So what if he couldn’t go somewhere with Yuri today? He still has the chance to send him off. 

For now, that’ll be enough. He’ll worry about the rest later. 

 

At one, JJ raps on Yuri’s door. There’s a thud and a swear -- and then the door opens. 

JJ doesn’t bother stifling his laugh. “You look cute, chaton.” 

Yuri’s hair is damp in parts, the drying areas curling wildly. It reminds JJ of a cat’s puffed up fur, and when he tells Yuri that, he gets a fierce tug on his bangs. 

“Thanks, though,” Yuri says when they get into JJ’s cheerful red rental car. “I’m sorry about today.”

“It’s no problem.” JJ smiles. “I said I’d be fine just spending time with you, right?” 

“Yeah, but that’s like,” Yuri struggles to find the right word, “too cheesy?” 

“I’m pretty cheesy. Do you want any music?” 

“Yeah, sure. Wait -- is this you? Do you seriously listen to your own music?” 

“It’s part of the creative process, Yuri-chan.” 

Yuri rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling. JJ decides to pause on the conversation, tries to achieve a ‘comfortable silence’ so he doesn’t scare Yuri off by talking too much. 

But Yuri starts telling him about gossip from the after party, so it’s okay, right? It  _ feels  _ okay, takes JJ’s mind off worrying if he’s too loud or annoying or all the things Yuri thought he was, and by the time they pull up to the airport, both of their cheeks are red from laughter. 

“So,” JJ says. “Here you are, brought to the ball by your valiant steed.” 

Yuri bites his lip. “Park and get coffee with me?” 

JJ feels like there’s an unspoken  _ please  _ there, and as intangible as it is, it has his heart doing quadruples. “Anything for you, Yuri.” 

Yuri looks pleased. JJ’s heart could win gold for its jumps right now. 

“We can say it’s like, pregaming our date?” JJ suggests. 

“You wouldn’t just say foreplay?” 

“That’s pretty public foreplay.” 

“We’ll call it a rain check then,” Yuri says. “That’s kind of boring, though.” 

“It can be everything and more.” JJ parks the car and they begin to walk, shoulders bumping comfortably. 

“So. How do these things work? Do you just talk about stuff?” Yuri mumbles. 

“Things? Like dates? Or relationships?” JJ’s surprised. “Aww, am I the first person you wanted to ask out?”

Yuri hedges. “The first person I planned to ask. But you beat me to it. Don’t let it get to your head, Leroy.” 

“My head is already inflated beyond measure,” JJ says dryly. “So they say.”

Yuri frowns. “Does it bother you?” 

“Not most of the time, but sometimes.” JJ waves a hand. “Since we missed out today, you can ask me out next time. I’ll be waiting.” 

Yuri’s  _ okay  _ is so quiet that JJ almost misses it. He reaches out and takes Yuri’s free hand and squeezes it. 

“Next time I’ll reclaim gold from you, Yuri-chan, and you can ask me out as my prize,” JJ says. “Maybe what I need is to train with you in Japan, eh?” 

Yuri’s cheeks flush, but he tips his head up proudly. “That won’t save you.” 

“But then we can go a real date,” JJ says. “Or are these competition only?”

_ Please don’t let it be like that please -- _

“We’ll figure it out,” Yuri says softly. He stops, leans up and puts his arms around JJ’s neck. “I thought we were gonna have more time today--” 

“I’m going to need you to spell this out, Yuri-chan.” JJ wraps his arms around Yuri’s waist with a small smile, tugs him forward. “But it’s sounding like you want to be together?” 

“Yeah,” Yuri says, “I do.” 

They’re close enough that all JJ can see is the blue-green of Yuri’s eyes, the faint freckles dotting his nose. The blonde of his eyelashes fluttering. All he can feel is Yuri’s careful breath. The bustle of the airport around them is  _ nothing,  _ and it feels like being on the rink. Like skating to the most beautiful song, the one that turns the audience into a victorious harmony. 

There’s electricity between them and he doesn’t want to let Yuri go. Not like this. 

“Hey, if our first kiss was at an airport, how cliche would that be?” JJ’s voice cracks and he buries his head in Yuri’s shoulder.  


“Let’s fucking do it.” 

JJ lifts his head; a smile burns steady on his lips. “My, you’re turning soft, Yuri-chan.” 

“Let’s _ fucking _ do it then,” Yuri repeats, and presses a laugh (slow-soft-perfect) between them. 

**Author's Note:**

> \-- they have a really long skype call after they get home because they both get embarrassed and tangential but they know they need to figure out the mechanics of starting an ldr. jj makes a lot of skating puns and yuri hangs up on him three times, the last because he has to sleep, and not before he tells jj good night, i promise i like you, you should dream of me. 
> 
> (to bakaramia: i hope you like it! <3)


End file.
